Friday 26 April 2013

Sneak Peek of my Script

Re my last post, as a thank your for all of your support over the last few months, below is an excerpt from my M.A.S.K. script.  This scene takes place around midway through the script and features part of one of the many battle scenes in my script and shouldn't give too much away.

I posted recently that Bandicoot is a new vehicle that I'd created for my script - in this scene you find out it's drivers name and her Mask.

I apologise for the formatting - for some reason Blogger won't allow me to keep the original formatting.  I hope that you enjoy and I look forward to your comments and remember to keep up-to-date on my Facebook Page.


CUT TO:



41 INT.MAYHEM’S WEAPONS PLANT.DAY.DAY 41 

In a dark corner, there is a Flash and ANNALIESE ZIEGLER
appears. From her position, she can see BUDDIE HAWKS
bound and hanging from the ceiling by his wrists. CLIFF
DAGGER is beating him. There is a lot of activity in the
background as PLANT STAFF are packing everything up.

ANNALIESE ZIEGLER
(Continues into her comm)
MATT; BUDDIE’s in trouble. I
can’t use RECON to get closer or
I’ll be putting us both in
danger; you need to get in here
now!

She moves out of the corner to get closer. SLY RAX and AL
MURANO are in the office having an argument.

AL MURANO
You can’t do this!

SLY RAX
Can’t I?

SLY RAX leaves through the office door with AL MURANO
following closely behind.

SLY RAX
(Continues)
Has he said anything yet?

CLIFF DAGGER
Not yet!

CLIFF DAGGER hits him once more in the stomach.

SLY RAX
Are you ready to tell me what I
want to know?

AL MURANO
RAX, I’m pleading with
ya... BUDDIE’s on our side. He
would never rat me out...

BUDDIE HAWKS
Save your breath, AL... I don’t
think your new friends are
believing you.

CLIFF DAGGER
Can I hit him again, RAX?

SLY RAX
Go for...

SLY RAX’s speech is cut off by a loud crash from behind
them. RHINO uses it’s battering ram to power through the
Garage Doors, followed by FIRECRACKER and JACKHAMMER as they open fire.

Mayhem all around as some of the PLANT STAFF pick up
weapons to return fire; others clamber into the vehicles
and start them up. Minor skirmishes ensue.

ANNALIESE has her sidearm ready and rushes into the
Fray. She takes out a few of the PLANT WORKERS but one of
them manages to knock her to the ground with the butt of
his machine gun and then points it at her and laughs...

ANNALIESE ZIEGLER
RECON; on.

She disappears in a flash. The PLANT WORKER looks around
confused. There is then another brief flash and ANNALIESE
reappears - this time astride BANDICOOT in it’s Action
Mode, guns pointing at the PLANT WORKER.

PLANT WORKER 1
Shi...

He is cut off as ANNALIESE fires her weapons at him.
Some of the PLANT STAFF make their escape on their
vehicles, ANNALIESE ZIEGLER and HONDO MACLEAN chase after
them in BANDICOOT and FIRECRACKER.

AL MURANO seizes the opportunity to attack CLIFF DAGGER to
help his friend BUDDIE HAWKS. DAGGER strikes back and
SLY RAX enters the fray - a gun goes off and AL slumps to
the ground.

BUDDIE HAWKS
AL...

RAX and DAGGER make their way to the back of the building
- MATT TRAKKER exits JACKHAMMER and fights his way through
to BUDDIE and the stricken AL - in the background all of
the enemy vehicles have either been destroyed or
escaped. We can see BRUCE SATO, ADAM TRAKKER and ALEX
SECTOR out of their vehicles using their "MASKS" - LIFTER,
LIGHTNING & JACKRABBIT respectively - to fend off the last
of the PLANT STAFF.

MATT cuts BUDDIE down and he slumps down beside the
stricken AL who moans lightly. In the background an oil
drum explodes causing parts of the roof to fall in.

ADAM TRAKKER
MATT! It’s starting to get
unstable in here!

MATT nods over to acknowledge his brother. BUDDIE is now
holding his friend AL in his arms.

BUDDIE HAWKS
AL! Who’s behind all of this.

AL looks into BUDDIE’s eyes, takes one last shallow breath
and then fades away. The moment is rocked as another oil
drum explodes - this time closer causing the ceiling above
MATT and BUDDIE to fall down. BRUCE comes to their aid.

BRUCE SATO
LIFTER; on!

The falling debris hangs in the air as LIFTER takes
effect. BRUCE makes a small motion and the debris is
easily thrown to the side.

BUDDIE HAWKS
They knew MATT! Some how they
knew I’m working for you.

MATT TRAKKER
We’ll worry about that
later... We need to get out of
here.

Another explosion; BRUCE again uses LIFTER on debris as
MATT and ADAM help BUDDIE into the back of RHINO. The
team make their exit from the building.

4 comments:

  1. I like it! The new mask, Recon, sounds interesting - I assume it turns her invisible? Out of interest, when you write, do you have any actors in your mind for the characters?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Recon's function is slightly different from what you guessed but would be clear if you read the whole script.

      When I was writing it I based them more on a cross between the cartoons and the comics. There are only two characters whom I'd associated with Actors - both of whom appear in The Mentalist. I think Simon Baker (Patrick Jane) would make an excellent Matt Trakker. Amanda Righetti (Grace Van Pelt) with her good looks and red hair I think would make a great Vanessa.

      Although, as writer, I wouldn't have much say in who the actors would be.

      I'm glad that you enjoyed it!

      Delete
  2. Very good. I enjoyed it. Is it an origin story? I was wondering why Matt was driving Jackhammer? Thank you for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Every good story has it's beginnings - so yes,this is an origin story.

      The UK comics were very much my influence when I was writing and the very first story showed you how the M.A.S.K. and V.E.N.O.M. teams were created and I always felt that this had to play a major role in the movie.

      I included the alternate "Real" jobs that the cartoon created for the characters. In my mind, the script is spoken by the great voice talents from the Cartoon so I couldn't really say who would be good in the roles, apart from the two mentioned in the comments above.

      In the UK comic Matt's brother is called Joe and in the comics that came with the toys he's called Andy. I din't want to use the name Joe as people might think G.I. Joe (there is a comical reference to the Joe's in my movie, though) and I'm not keen on the name Andy (I've met a few Andy's in my life whom I didn't get on with so put me off the name). So came up with Adam instead.

      There were similarities between the UK Comic Origin Story and the movie Sahara - whereby a sail propelled land vehicle is made. This meant that I had to completely come up with a new and original idea for my script. Therefore there will be no massacre of an entire M.A.S.K. team.

      There is a small scene that sets this scene up - had I included this, you would see that Adam is driving Jackhammer and Matt is it's Co-Pilot, Bruce and Alex (not mentioned in this part but implied from the previous scene) in Rhino and then Hondo in Firecracker.

      Annaliese, of course, has Bandicoot and her Recon Adventure Pack. Later on, one of the regular M.A.S.K. team members has his own Adventure Pack instead of the vehicle that he is normally famed for driving.

      Delete